I believe the Lord delights in honoring our dreaming.

In the wake of hearing of another influential author that had gone to walk with the Lord, my husband and I had been talking about taking the chance to meet any living authors or teachers that had impacted us. I mean, why not try? Maybe they could answer our questions or become a real friend? Why couldn’t these mentors on paper become mentors more personally?

It was in the midst of this dreaming that I received a message late one evening, asking if I’d like to go and meet a favorite author with my friend who had won a contest for a visit.

My husband just smirked at me and said, “Definitely. Go for it!“

 

Within an hour I had a seat on the same flight. A flight, also ironically, to a state I’d declared that week that I wanted to go to – beautiful Colorado. The Lord has been listening to my homeschool Geography lessons…and my dreaming.

 

This whirlwind trip seemed like a dream of circumstances for 2 busy moms of little boys – traveling without kids, time away with a friend, hotel and rental car provided, unseasonably warm winter weather in Colorado, the promise of a yummy menu (we didn’t have to cook!) and meeting Sally Clarkson at the other end!

I had so many friends ask when I got back what we took away from the day and wish to highlight some of my favorite afterthoughts, some expressly shared and some picked up by observation, but each a fingerprint of her intentional life.

 

 

1) Spoken – Choosing your Ideals

 

We six ladies, and one adorable preemie, crowded into Sally’s intimate study, which was a visual feast of all of her favorite things. By intentional design, images of whatever inspires or motivates her can all be seen from her comfy chair. 

These “favorite things” reflect the ideals anyone might gather from reading one of her books – pictures of family and her ideal of time with them and priority given them. Overflowing bookshelves and the ideal of feeding her curiosity, vocabulary and storytelling with good literature. Pictures of flowers and nature next to a lovely wide window to reflect her ideal of loving beauty and making her home a place where that is easily seen.

But what stood out to me was her encouragement to choose a few ideals we feel the Lord has put on our heart and pursue them.

But not all of them.

We cannot possibly hold up every ideal that every voice would emphasize and succeed at them. It would be exhausting. I cannot give hours a day to studying and homeschooling, coaching and sports, baking and cleaning AND my marriage AND ministry AND working!

But we can pick the few ideals most dear to our hearts and pour our lives into becoming them. With God’s help the other ideals would fade from importance in light of the ones we were doing well. And she gave us the sense that that would be enough.

And we all breathed a sigh of relief.

 

2) Unspoken – Put your time in where it’s important

 

Honestly, I felt a little awe-struck being welcomed into Sally’s house, meeting someone who seemed a little larger than life, at least in the homeschool, parenting world.

There were interesting pieces from around the world everywhere, and lovely pictures of her family covering the walls. Vases of flowers, candles and tea cups, just as you would expect if you listen to her, were spotted right away from my mental MomHeart checklist.

But the part that made me relax?

Spotting a little dust on an end table.

(Please don’t be mad at me Sally, it was just a little!)

Seeing this dust made her seem more real and I found myself settling back into her comfortable leather couch, exhaling and feeling more at home.

This too backs up her words about having ideals that you pursue and knowing that you cannot keep all of them. She held true to her ideals to provide for guests by roasting us pecans, planning a schedule of meaningful conversation topics for the day, and setting out her favorite tea cups for us to use. I saw that her priorities were geared toward serving and it made me think about what I’m telling others is most important about them being with me in my home. I don’t want to care if there are dirty dishes in the sink as long as there are 2 clean cups to stop and share coffee with a friend!

 

3) Spoken – Offering quick, easy friendship

 

On this crisp Saturday morning when I pulled up to Sally’s mountain house, the only ladies that I knew were my friend from home and another sweet lady, Stefanie, I met the night before over dinner. Usually going into a social situation with a group of strangers makes me nervous, quiet, unsure of myself and not sharing who I am because of that uncertainty.

But Sally corralled us all in with hugs and excitement and soon had us circled in the living room sharing about what in our lives we all loved. Deep questions and feelings, were quickly shared within the first hour. How did she orchestrate that among strangers?

Of course, from Sally’s writing and speaking we all felt like we “knew” her and her children. Stories of their failures, struggles, joys and successes had drawn us into the Clarkson home like a welcomed observer.  There was an ease she presented in welcoming us that made us comfortable to share those things too.

Over the day as she asked us about our lives, families, and ministries we got the sense that she was an advocate for us, that she loved us. I marveled by lunch time how the conversations did not feel awkward or strained. We basked in her genuine interest in us and our ideals.  She had a funny story to relate to every experience we shared and her openness made us unafraid to laugh at ourselves. I wanted to welcome people into my home and tear down the wall of unfamiliarity when they came in too.

 

4) Unspoken – The Influence of Scripture around the house

 

I hate to admit this lesson was learned from trips to the bathroom… but after several trips (we had a lot of tea!) I realized I had memorized the verse that was framed on the counter just by reading it each time!

This incidental lesson made start to take notice of the scripted verses, poems and quotes there were literally everywhere around me in her beautiful house. From anywhere you sat you could read half a dozen meaningful sayings and encouraging verses. What a powerful way to fill your mind with truth as you go about your day! Imagine how that could fill the minds of your children, without much effort or you repeating yourself!

It started me on a search for old Scripture prints when I got home and I found this sign in an old family Bible. What I found kindred about Sally’s house is that we too have odd pieces from around the world and “interesting” items, thrift store finds, and re-purposed treasures that have our guests asking, “What is that??” Which is a conversation which we both love to begin!

 

 

I’ll have to admit my grocery bill has gone up a little since my visit to Sally’s.

Weekly I’m searching the discounted flowers and trying to make good out of what is not yet wilted. There is a candle lit at our school table now and I’m hunting antique stores for vintages verse and quote prints to hang, but I think these little intentional reminders of beauty are worth it.

 

5) Spoken – Words of Life

 

Sally shared many stories that day of the life-giving encouragement, correction and hope she gave to her children through the words she carefully considered and shared. Too much diciplining is done through ill-chosen, rash words that do more harm in the long wrong than in which the bad behavior may have resulted. What made the difference was hearing how her children responded, changed course, or now remember situations, because grace and forgiveness were easily found in their house.

They believed firmly that she believed in them, and their constant mealtime discussions and debates defined them as little ones whose ideas mattered. I want my words to be filled with life and hope, grace, God’s Word, and intention to the little ones that look to me to make the world make sense.

But what about for you? Sally’s podcasts are one way that I can soak up those words of life throughout the week. Through her voice you can imagine yourself sitting knee to knee in her little study, cupping your tea as she cheers you on in this great role of parenting; offering you words of life from a heart that draws close to the Father for wisdom.

 

The day Sally planned for us was everything that warms my heart, from thoughtful treats to intentional discussions picked according the room we were sitting in. We had all come to hear from her but she spent a long time listening and asking about us. Honestly, as a room full of ladies that are constantly pouring out, this ministered greatly to refill us and help us feel cared for when we often let ourselves run dry at the expense of others.

I didn’t need more confirmation that Sally’s life and message was the real deal, but spending this day with her true priorities, shepherding heart and generous love displayed that she is everything in person that she portrays in her books and I hope you will take the time to make her your mentor in life too!

 

I am excited about her and her husband’s book “The Lifegiving Parent” because it is written by the rich experiences of Sally and her husband Clay, with guiding principles on how to cultivate a home that is more than Christian by name, but filled with the changing presence of Christ. 

 

“We need to distinquish between a home that is considered Christian primarily because cultural Christianity happens there and a home that is Christian because Christ is alive and present in perceptible ways.”

– The Lifegiving Parent

by Clay & Sally Clarkson

 

 

Read more about this new book, releasing on May 1, or pre-order here:

 

Eeek! And we got to be part of a spontaneous podcast portion of Episode #118 at the end. Go ahead and listen to the whole podcast though to hear the wonderful Kat Lee discuss Hello Mornings, about setting out with the Lord for each new day!

 

 

 

What’s been a memorable way Sally has affected your parenting or home?

Tell us below and share with others why authors that mentor you are so important!

Who needs Clay & Sally’s voice in their lives that you know?